Tue 23 Oct 2012
Day 23: 31 Days of Life in the StepMom Trenches (Vlogtober)
“Halloween’s coming and the goose is getting fat,
Would you please put a penny in the old man’s hat,
If you haven’t got a penny, a halfpenny will do,
If you haven’t got a halfpenny, God bless you.” – Celtic Nursery Rhyme
Halloween is a time for kids to dress up and eat candy. It has the potential to create many cherished memories for both kids and parents. Sadly, in co-parenting situations, Halloween can become a time of stress when two households vie for treating time and costume rights. Often, as stepmoms, we step in to help our stepkids when they tell us they don’t have a costume. Many times after we get the costume, mom gets one too and then the child is left to decide. Kids just don’t like having to choose between homes.
In today’s vlog, I speak candidly about how Halloween can bring heartache to stepmoms and offer words of encouragement.
Takeaway: Think of a solution to your Halloween dilemma if you have one. Offer to keep a costume at your house for the kids to play dress up in. Take them trick or treating when they are at your house (ask a few neighbors if they can save some candy for your kids.) Tell your stepkids that you hope they enjoy their Halloween with mom and that you will never ask them to choose between the two homes. Tell them their happiness and peace is important to you – wow! Now that’s a great message to send.
Note: sometimes our words spoken will precede our feelings. Speak positive words and feel positive afterwards.
Is Halloween a stressful time in your stepfamily?